God, y u do this?

ITs said that if v be honest n fair n judicial n empathetic n committed, v have all the reason s to believe that v r on right track with GOD as the destnation. U will agree that haw hard its to walk on this way. Despite that with continous introspections & retrospectios, I have been trying my hard to walk on...& I ENJOY that. But still y...y do I have to face these dejections, presumptions, emotional blackmailings from my spouse...pain for my parents...such loving n GIVING parents. I have been so accomodating thruout my life...adjusting the adversities, yet after so many years my husband tells me that he loves me a lot but still wants a divorce. This is not what i have been working for, for so many years. I married someone whom I personally never approved of, yet accepted him without uttering a word. Accomodated his huge family without complaining. Raised our kids with total dedications. Helped him settle his business by borrowing money from my parents & brother. Assisted him shoulder to shoulder to enable him to come out of emotional trauma he was undergoing due to his brothers. Was a navigator when he was driving through the jumbled track to resettle him in his business. Just b'coz I have become friendly with a girl whom he doen't like, Do I really deserve even a statement carrying the word "DIvorce"?? Do may parents deserve a treatment like this?? If u were really up thee, watching all this, y didn't u ever intervene...its going on for an year and u have left me in the battlefield all alone. I always considered you my buddy, sought u in poor man, small kids, helpless animals, felt connected...but where that connection has gone now?? I could never even dream of a situation like this..what my comittment & layality is paying me!! WHERE ARE YOU?? DO YOU REALLY EXIST??